Stolen Moments

I wrote the following yesterday in my journal...it's a capsule of the past few days. Today was quiet, mom slept quite a bit, and is very agitated...her anxiety meds weren't given for very long period yesterday, and it caught up with her today. Mom's vitals are still doing OK...but she's slipping more every day. The nurses are adjusting the dosages, she should be back to a more "at peace" mom tomorrow. What I wrote yesterday:

Mom is sleeping right now and I'm sitting bedside writing this. We have mom's favorite CDs playing very softly right now, Frank Sinatra is singing "One for My Baby"....and every lyric to every happy and sad love song that comes on that CD player applies. The tears are just streaming down my face...she looks so peaceful right now......

I'd like to share with you the few stolen moments we've had with mom in the past few days.

* Mom smiled big when Bill came in to the room. I said to her, "Mom, you know when Bill comes into the room, don't you? He smells soooo good, you can smell him, right?" Mom said "stinky"

* Michael and Carol (my step-brother and his wife) came in and Michael was sharing with mom about a dance he had with her years ago....mom remembered that dance and started humming the tune.

* When Carol, Michael & Lily (their beautiful daughter) were in the room with mom this morning, Lily gave mom a hug and then mom even asked for one more. When Carol leaned in for her hug, mom said to her " you were so scared when she was in the bassinet".....when Michael leaned in for a hug, she whispered, "you were so scared to be a mother" to which he replied, "Yeah, but I got the sex part wrong"....and she laughed.

* This morning when Aunt Charlene and I came in to the room, she said "I love you"....

* When Aunt Joyce went in this morning with Dina, she kissed mom and mom said "you're a good kisser". Joyce said "well, I'll have to give you more kisses then"....afterwords, mom said, "they felt good from 'here to here', pointing at her mouth and her belly. *smile* Joyce came out and said, "I think she thought I was Bill".....

* The teachers will enjoy this. Last night, mom was having a lucid moment, so the nurse called me to the room. There were a few of us in there. I sat down next to mom and held her hand. She was talking in a fairly normal tone (she's been whispering a lot lately) and she said, "Gina....I had the weirdest dream.......what is happening to me? I went out...I left the house..." (there are times that you can ask questions when someone is in this state and times when you shouldn't...but since she addressed me specifically, I asked questions. We were all in anticipation of an 'other world' experience mom may have had.) I asked her, "where did you go mom?" She said "I went out. I went to school." I said, "cool beans". In her best sarcastic tone, she said, "what cool beans, what's so cool about it?"......I asked if there were people there. She said "yeah". She was confused, so I asked her if Eltonia was there, she said 'yeah'......she said that she got up, got dressed and went out. I asked her if she drove the Jaguar. She said 'yeah'.....I said, "how did it look?"...she said "shiny" and she started drifting..... So...if it was an "other world" experience, it seems like teachers will always be working and teaching, even in the afterlife. *smile*

*Toni and I went into the room...Bill was already in there, playing his Randy Travis CD...the song, "Forever and Ever, Amen" was playing. Mom had her eyes closed, we were all softly singing the song to her.....

* OK..to lighten up the mood a little....Courtney is an angel. Courtney is Bill's daughter, whom mom loves very much. We had all met Courtney, but didn't really get to know her the way mom did until October 1st, when mom was first diagnosed. We are so glad to have another sister in the family. Courtney felt that we all needed a laugh, so she took the pictures from the blog and sent the following two links. Courtney is the one with the very dark hair...the others at the link are me, Toni (no bangs), and Dina (bangs). Samantha is the addition (she has dimples) in the second link. Today is Courtney's birthday - happy birthday kiddo! We love you!

http://sendables.jibjab.com/view/7GJGsUvv3zdmyr2F

http://sendables.jibjab.com/view/NZQsHVVlQhojp3Ia